Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Is It Really Me?

Give up! You can't be perfect! All this while you live your life trying to be loved and accepted, And you're nobody. So why waste 18 years of precious life, trying so hard to be what everyone expects you to be? You can't fit in! You were born to stand out. Way above the crowd, where you can shine and be looked upon. All you gotta do is give up. How do you think you can be good? Donning the pretense of someone else's identity? Plugging your ears from the plea constantly filling your ears from within? And you ask me why am I blowing away my life in smoky circles of self destruction? Its not destruction, its liberation. Every puff that glows up in the end reminds me that I don't have a long time to go. Every gray of the ash that floats away, some empty memory of complete insignificance withers away. I don't care. You call me a loser, for I won't stand one night. I don't care. And she said, you left the closet open, what will people say? I don't care. And he said, colors don't fetch money! I don't care. And everyone says Oh Dear Lord! He sleeps with men! I really don't fucking care! I have given up. So don't expect me to be the Technicolor advert of sweet gentleness. Don't expect me to apple polish you all the time. Don't expect me to change back because that was not me. I wasn't me all this while. So I have given up. All that matters, is me. What I want. What I like. What I do. The good, the bad, the ugly. It's all me. I promise you that I won't ever hurt you. And I promise you that you can't have me in installments. You don't get to choose. For I won't barter my freedom to fit in. I choose to stand alone and I am rejoicing it. Finally I found myself, finally its me! So just give in. You know you love me, for you wouldn't be reading this line. As the cliché goes, life is too short. So lose that facade and find yourself. And give in to this ecstatic freedom. For there is no greater joy than staring into the person staring back at you from behind the mirror. And this is not just any mirror. Its the mirror of life!

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